Last Thursday my girl Sheshana and I hit up the #Uncapped Toronto event x Vitamin Water X Fader at CBC studios. It was cute. Potty Mouth and Draggonette performed. The stage itself was beautiful. The drinks were flowing all night. The people were pretty. There was a DJ but nobody danced, despite the enormous space. The music didn’t quite inspire I guess. There was an after party at WrongBar that played some cool tunes and Shesh and I were able to get it in and release are spirits and dance for a solid half hour. I had a great night. But throughout it all I couldn’t help but notice the problem with no name. Every city has their own unique brand of this problem, I guess it’s a symptom of the times.
Perhaps I stand alone in wanting to free up at parties, dance, interact with new people in platonic ways and laugh. It didn’t quite appear the crowd shared my sediments, although we did have an interesting theoretical conversation outside in the smoking section with two interesting strangers who were patiently waiting for Chromeo to arrive.
I guess I should be the change I wish to see, and I do honestly try – but after 10 years living in New York I still feel like the eternal stranger in my city. I throw the ball out there, but it doesn’t always bounce back as fast. Everyone seems so skeptical?
I wish people in Toronto had more pride and confidence in who they are – than in who they know or where they’ve traveled to.
There is a sense of individuality that is not fostered here, and I think this issue needs to be addressed.
There is a defensive snobbery that comes from some sort of sense of inferiority – this innate need to prove and dis-credit.
The risk takers fewer and farther in-between the masses of trend worshippers.
Intentions are less often genuine, but self serving even in relaxed settings. There is less desire to connect with new people just to have fun and be, perhaps they are too busy judging to notice what they are missing. (cough cough: the highest form of ignorance is to judge someone you know nothing about)
It’s fuckin corny.
Like relax, stop taking yourself so damn seriously.
your truth, your passion, your unique perfection with your community.
The night inspired this poem:
“The Problem with no name”
Masked men and women
talk through their masks
established lies dodge the cold facts
Acting the way they deem cool to be
not knowing that fear is all that they see
They’re intrigued by the dark
fascinated by greed
in love with the ego and so they service his needs
like a desperate woman
becoming a feen
servicing men to make her ends meet
Cause they don’t believe that they could achieve without a financial guarantee
Cause that’s how it bees
and that’s how it is
one foot to the right
one foot to the left
they don’t want to give
so it’s secretly kept
while they seem to forget
silent prayers in my head
as I stand in their vision
sacred thoughts hidden
only to the blind
My vibration finds other like minds
Eliminate time and join us as one
His will is done, truth shines like the sun
and may the light inside me set someone else free.
September 13, 2013